How often do you reflect on why you feel burned out from work? Do you usually attribute it to a chaotic work environment and long hours? Have you ever considered that it might be due to the need to act “out of character” in your leadership role?
Over the past nine months, I’ve deepened my coaching practice by becoming a certified coach using the PrinciplesYou personality assessment. I’ve seen firsthand how transformative these assessments can be when they help individuals understand themselves better. It’s truly a tool for profound self-discovery.
Through PrinciplesYou, I was introduced to psychologist Brian Little. While Brian Little isn’t a household name, he’s well known in the personality psychology arena and his TedTalk, “Who Are You, Really? The Puzzle of Personality,” has more than 12 million views.
Little is a large contributor to the creation of the PrinciplesYou personality assessment, and one of the concepts that has resonated deeply with my clients is “free traits.”
Our Personality Traits: Core Traits vs. “Free Traits”
According to Little, a free trait is a behavior that a person adopts which may not align with their natural personality traits but is employed in pursuit of a “personal project,” often associated with professional endeavors or family goals.
To see this idea in action, let me share a story. Many of my clients are natural introverts working in leadership roles. They thrive in quiet, reflective environments, yet their careers require them to be constantly in the spotlight—leading change management exercises, mentoring their teams, and navigating challenging inter-team dynamics.
This is where the idea of free traits comes into play. Free traits are like the superhero costumes of our personality—behaviors we slip into when our goals or passions call for it. They might not feel like "us," but they serve a purpose. My introverted clients have learned to don the cape of extroversion to thrive in their leadership roles. It’s not about transforming into a social butterfly overnight; it’s about choosing to act outside their natural inclinations to meet the demands of their role.
Brian Little’s theory emphasizes this flexibility. While our core traits—such as being introverted or extroverted—tend to stay consistent, we can step into these free traits when needed. It’s a bit like method acting for real life, allowing us to adapt and achieve our “personal projects” or career goals, even if it means temporarily acting out of character.
In a nutshell, free traits are the adaptive behaviors we adopt to navigate our lives and succeed in our endeavors. They prove that while we might be rooted in our core traits, we have the flexibility to stretch beyond them when the situation calls for it. This understanding has been especially empowering for my clients, as it highlights not only the importance of knowing oneself but also the incredible potential for growth and adaptability in pursuing one’s goals.
The Darker Side of “Free Traits”
However, tapping into our free traits comes with its own set of challenges. A major pitfall to be mindful of is the risk of burnout. Many of my clients were initially unaware of how the demands of their jobs were contributing to their burnout, especially when those demands required them to act out of character. It wasn't until they completed a personality assessment that they began to understand this crucial connection.
As Brian Little says, “Many people act out of character through free traits…. but we may pay a price if we act out of character for a long period.”
Seeing my clients embrace their free traits has been one of the most rewarding aspects of my coaching journey. It’s a reminder that we are not confined by our natural tendencies; instead, we can leverage them, adapt, and grow in ways that align with our personal and professional aspirations.
Restorative Practices to Combat Burnout
If you’re feeling burned out from work, one of the most important things to assess is your restorative practices. Here are three essential ones:
Scheduled Downtime
Intentionally schedule downtime. Set aside specific times in your day or week to disconnect from work and engage in activities that relax and rejuvenate you. This could be as simple as taking a walk in nature, reading a book, or enjoying a hobby. Making downtime a non-negotiable part of your routine ensures regular opportunities to recharge.
2. Mindfulness and Reflection
Incorporate mindfulness practices into your daily routine to manage stress and maintain focus. Techniques such as meditation, deep breathing exercises, or journaling can help center your thoughts and provide a sense of calm. Reflection, whether through writing or quiet contemplation, allows you to process your experiences and gain insights into your emotional and mental states, helping you stay grounded.
3. Going Out and Socializing
This may sound counter-intuitive, but going out and socializing is a key restorative practice, especially for extroverts. Many of my clients, particularly those who thrive on social interaction, aren't getting nearly enough social time as they sit behind their computers all day. We are in the midst of a "loneliness epidemic," and it's crucial to bring self-awareness to your needs for socializing. Brian Little emphasizes that extroverts need social environments like bars or gatherings to recharge. Meeting people in person can have a profoundly restorative impact, providing emotional support, reducing stress, and boosting overall well-being. Make it a priority to reconnect with friends, attend social gatherings, or participate in community activities to fulfill this essential aspect of your life.
By incorporating these restorative practices into your routine, you can better manage the demands of acting out of character and maintain a healthy balance between your professional and personal life.
Learn More About Unlocking Your True Potential with Personality Assessments
Leaders I work with seek to develop self-awareness about their thinking, engagement with others, and application of skills as a foundation for setting goals. Through my Masterclass of self-discovery, I guide clients to profound personal insights.
PrinciplesYou offers a free assessment and detailed report to kickstart this self-discovery process. If you're looking for a certified coach to help you interpret your results and unlock your potential, reach out to learn more.